There is no doubt that it can be difficult to find yourself in a relationship where you just can’t seem to make it work anymore. Small conflicts have a way of becoming huge issues. Where the communication once worked, it is now completely lost. Before you both throw in the towel for good, couples counseling may be worth a try. In seeking help from a neutral party, there is potential to resolve the communication break down and get back to the love that is still there. Couples counseling is especially important for the rest of the family. So often, children absorb the issues of their parents. In seeking help from a professional, the whole family may benefit from developing the necessary tools to get along whether or not the couple stays together.
Mending the relationship
In speaking with a professional who is unbiased, many couples have found their way back to each other. In relationships, there is a lot of give and take. Very often, the day to day activities and stressors overshadow the love and compassion for each other. Leaving one or both people feeling like they are giving more than receiving. Finding a safe place to speak openly about the relationship- both positive and negative- is often the answer to a more fulfilling relationship.
Deciding on divorce
Sometimes, counseling helps a couple to see that it is okay to file for divorce and move on with separate lives. At first, it is natural for the idea of divorce to be incredibly scary and unknown. However, with the guidance of a professional, who can put things in manageable terms and help create a positive perspective for the future, it may be a relief. It is true that change can be uncomfortable and terrifying, but sometimes it is the necessary option in a relationship.
Helping the children process the change
A therapist for counseling in Palatine, IL can be an important advisor in how the couple handles the changes that come with divorce for the children. It is important to remember that children are resilient but they do look to the adults for cues on how to feel about and react to huge changes in their life. A neutral party, such as a therapist can act as a mediator in whatever capacity makes sense for the family dynamics. He or she may guide the couple on how to tell the children about the divorce; it may even be helpful for the children to attend a session with the couple. At the very least, the therapist can guide the couple on how help their kids process the divorce. In the event that the children act out and show undesirable behaviors, therapy can provide a safe place where the parents can learn how to respond to those behaviors and help the children work through their feelings.
In any divorce, there will be a need to decide on a schedule and routine for the children to be able to spend time with both parents, especially if the children are young. It will be important to be clear with the children about what to expect and be consistent with the routine. The arrangements can be discussed during counseling sessions with the help of a neutral professional.
Thanks to Lotus Wellness Center for their insight into counseling and family.